Logan has never heard of Lawrence of Arabia or David Bowie. I'm in tears.

My birthday was just a touch over a week ago, but it just now occurred to me to reflect on the past year. In a word, damn. It was a huge fucking year in my life, man. i turned 21. i learned how to drink, and i learned how to overdrink. i tried pot. i figured out that i'm not actually a big fan of pot, but at least now i know because i tried it. i started to fall in love. i lost my virginity. i got dumped and faced the downside of being emotionally invested in a relationship. i realized that i was going nowhere in college, and indeed nowhere in life. i subsequently admitted my failure at higher education, then i vowed to try again in the future. i agonized, man, for weeks over the fact that i couldn't hack it in school. i'm a smart kid, man, with air quotes. That's my identity. i'm a "smart kid." And yet i failed out of college. i made my peace with it. i wiped away the tears of anguish, and i strode forward into unemployment. My unemployment continues even today, after two months of searching for a job. i've run out of money no fewer than 4 times during the last 6 months. i've found myself to be the best person i've ever been, education and employment aside, and as a result of that last little gem, i've come through it all an overall happy person. When you consider all the shit i've piled on myself the last 12 months, it's a miracle that i'm happy. It's a fucking miracle.

life sucks. not all of it, no, but most. i'm speaking here of my life, mind you, not life in the general sense. i need a full-time job. i need money. i need some sense of urgency or ambition. and i need to do this all myself.

which brings me to another reason why my life sucks right now. people seem to think that i want/need their advice. i don't. there are VERY few people whose advice i'm interested in, and i've asked them. if i haven't asked you for advice, i don't want it. period. so shut the fuck up and stop bringing it up. it's my problem, my business, not yours. i know you've got your own goddamn business to mind, so get to it.

i mean, maybe i was being naive when i expected other people to grow the same way i have, to learn what is and isn't ok to say or ask, especially with other people around. obviously, that was a foolish thing to expect, because certain people have completely failed to grow in these aspects, and it routinely ruins my day.

all of these things have kept me up now almost 2 hours after i went to bed. so, in conclusion, god damn it.

Oh.

My.

God.

Classic.

sidney lowe.

check it.

i feel i ought to address a certain issue. First of all, awesome that NC State had 3 defensive linemen selected in the first round of the NFL draft this year. williams was a no-brainer for the top 5, and lawson appeared to be a solid first-round selection, but mccargo came as a surprise to me. Ah well, such is the NFL draft.

What isn't awesome is analysts looking at State's record this year and using that to devalue 3 excellent players. Our defense was still very very good. It's just that our offense was anemic. Do a little fucking homework, guys. Yeah, the team overall was mediocre at best, but our defensive line was one of the best in the nation. Why do all sports analysts besides jay bilas, bill walton, and harold reynolds seem to want me to hate them?

In happier news, there's this gem. It pretty well speaks for itself.

And also, i know it's sort of an old story, but i simply can't get over the fact that he managed to tarnish the name of "pete rose." Simply extraordinary.

Ok, that's all. i pretty much ran the gamut of emotions in 5 paragraphs. Peace.

Eric

Fuck lee fowler. Fuck him a lot. When herb left, i was optimistic. "Hey," i said, "this is our chance to get a better coach." We have not gotten a better coach. We've wasted a month of valuable recruiting time only to be turned down by some coaches and straight avoided by others. Now we're going to end up with a worse coach and no recruits to put under him. i don't want john beilein. i don't want a perimeter-based offense. i wanted john calipari. i wanted steve lavin. i wanted frank haith. All three of them gave us the finger. For the foreseeable future, NC State basketball is well and properly fucked. Goddammit.

First of all, and i know i'm a few days late on this, but here it is, anyway: ramon hernandez.

!!!!!!!!!!!!


Second, i have a new favorite show. It's on MTV, and it's called Yo Momma. It's hosted by Fez, and it pretty much consists of funny people making fun of each other for half an hour. Tell me how nobody thought of that before now.

That is all. Peace.

Eric